just a bad dream
by whiteyaksha
Summary: hijikata was patrolling on halloween night till he saw a haunted house...


it was Halloween night tousirou hijikata was out patrolling he is pissed off as usual because of children out at their curfew because it was like 12:00 at midnight, his throat hurts because of the yelling he was really tired, and still can't go home till morning so that made him more angry, it was that sadist's fault, hijikata wished that mitsuba was alive and sougo would be dead instead, that would make him happy, in fact that would make him the most happy man in the world.

But it was impossible, he then stopped thinking and went back looking for kids out their curfew

He then realized that there was a haunted house that wasn't there before

He came in the house and it seemed that it was real, there were dead bodies, blood everywhere and WORST (but not for him actually it was happy for him) sougo's head was hanging while his eyeballs was missing, hijikata smiled and whispered "that's what you get sougo for insulting the lady in red kimono" hijikata was happy but scared at the same time because when he was about to get out the door suddenly closed and hijikata was surprised but now shocked of what he saw.

He saw the heads of his friends gintoki,kondo,shinpachi,etc. and worst he saw the head of his loved brother with something written on the wall hijikata took a closer look "you are next hijikata be prepared you can run but you can't hide, all this heads was just the beginning you are next be prepared to meet THE WOMAN IN RED KIMONO WAHAHAHAHAHA" Hijikata was shocked and decided to run the door slowly opened when he came out a sudden familiar faces that he thought they were dead was standing in front of him.

They yelled "happy Halloween mayora!"

Hijikata was so surprised and realized that shinpachi's glasses was not on his face hijikata asked "hey shinpachi where's your glasses? I almost mistaken you as sougo with black hair" shinpachi smiled while rubbing his head and said "sorry but my glasses accidentally fell into toxic waste and I can't pick it up because it already melted and I promise I will buy a new one"

The all of them was laughing until there was an earthquake.

They looked behind the house and there was a giant pair of glasses with arms, legs and especially a mouth, a giant one.

The glasses then picked up shinpachi and opened it's incredibly large mouth of never ending space then it ate shinpachi, crunching the whole shinpachi there was blood splattering everywhere, and the all of them was shocked except gintoki he was picking his nose while on the other hand he gave a thumbs up, saying "good job, getting rid of that useless human shinpachi good job I think you deserve a day off"

The glasses looked at gintoki and picked him up too but instead of slowly putting in it's mouth, instead the glasses threw him and caught him by it's mouth and crunching him slowly the only things left from gintoki is his lake toya sword and his arm that was giving a thumbs up, the one who caught his arm was kagura, when she caught it she threw it away and ran while screaming "SHINPACHI BECAME A ZOMBIE RUUUUUN –ARU" all of them ran but they were all caught by the glasses monster they were eaten one by one, hijikata was the last one, he ran as fast as he can, but sadly he was caught too.

While he was thrown in the mouth he wasn't chewed but instead was swallowed, while he was sliding down he saw the body parts of his friends he saw blood everywhere and when he slid down to the stomach he saw bodies not just his friends but all the people in edo and yoshiwara he even saw tsukuyo there too

He was looking for someone alive, but he stopped because he saw a hallucination of his brother tamegoro, he said "hijikata you have grown so strong and handsome now" hijikata cried and whispered "bi-big bro.." he was about to hug his big brother but.

It was a dream and hijikata was still dreaming, he was sleep talking too, sougo noticed his shoutings and realized that he wet his bed, so sougo grabbed his camera and took pictures and a video.

when hijikata woke up he realized it was all a dream, he then came out for some breakfast but suddenly all the shinsengumi officers were laughing at him and shouing "hey boss do you miss your big bro? hahaha" and some are shouting "he needs a big bro to read him bedtime stories so that he will not have nightmares and not wet his bed ahahhahaha" hijikata looked at his buttocks and it was wet he whispered "sougo die you stinking sadist! DIE"

then he came to the computer shop to log in facebook, when he came in the computer shop and all the people saw him they souted "HEY IT'S THE WET PANTS BOY HAHAHAH" hijikata was embarrassed and was about to go out but yamazaki yelled "boss you need to see this it is spreading trough the internet, hijikata saw it and felt like he is going to another planet and never come back.

and surprisingly he did, the vice-commander was now okita sougo and the one who took sougo's place was now yamazaki sagaru.

10 years have passed yet no one heard of hijikata ever since everyone had a happy family.

THE END

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**sorry if it doesn't make sense someone requested this to me and sorry if it's short like I said on my first chapter "the last kiss" I'm just that lazy :P and it's your turn to imagine what happened to hijikata, because I'm too lazy to say what happened to him hope you enjoy it! :D**


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